And my sleeping disorders keep kicking on… I’m sleeping too much and when I wake up, I’m tired. I mean, real tired! I think I don’t have much energy to burn, I’ve started my diet about a week ago or more, so I feel weak. Well, I feel lighter, but weak. So weak I cant exercise… I don’t like this feeling, but I think its normal when you are on a diet that your not allowed almost anything apart from veggies and jelly.

Well, you might think I’m getting crazy and got this diet out of my little twisted head. But I actually went to a dietician and was her who gave me my food schedule. In all diets there are things you are allowed to eat freely, and on mine are only things I don’t like: coffee (I don’t drink often because gives me headaches and heartburn, too much caffeine makes me sick), tea (I hate tea, any tea, I refuse to drink tea), jelly (ok, you can go on that until certain point, where you cant stand look at it anymore, that’s my case), water (the doctor said to me to drink ATLEAST 2 liters per day!!! If I manage to drink one I’m happy!!!), veggies (yeah ok, I was raised in a family that never liked vegetables, so they simply didn’t make part of my whole life! So do you really think I would start liking them out of the blue? No, I hate!), lemonade (made with the real fruit I like but I cant drink freely as I wished, its too acid and gives me stomach aches) and diet coke (that one, for the same reasons as the lemonade, but instead of too acid, its too fizzy).

Before you ask: So why cant you eat a fruit? I reply, what fruit? I’m not allowed EAT any fruit only DRINK their juices and only ONE glass per day! At night I suppose to eat only soup but this part of the diet I cant, I tried for 2 days, but I don’t like soup and they don’t fill me up, so I repeat the breakfast meal instead (which I’m allowed but only after 10 days you started this diet).

No wonder I’m always in a bad mood!!! Starvation makes me moody, and with no energy on my body, makes me tired and sleepy = good combination!!! When it gets to my PMT period, whole crap better no one be in front of me!!! I’m too tired that I already caught a flu, throat ache and headache. But I want to loose weight, and if the wish comes with I want to loose weight NO MATTER WHAT, I guess I have to stop moaning and just keep my feelings to myself. But as the blog is mine at least I can say these things over here. I’m an impatient bugger like my husband loves to say to me, but I just wish I could get thinner FAST!!! But I guess things cant come right here, right now =(((

XxX

Well, today I had a night of hell and God knows why. Sometimes I wake up around 3, 4 am and cant get to sleep anymore, sometimes it’s the opposite: I sleep until 12, 1 pm. I have sleep disorders. I wish I could feel tired and go to sleep well with no worries or issues hammed on my head. I think about a billion things before fall asleep and it gets me nightmares, unsettlement and when I wake up I feel like I have done about 10 miles worth of running or a train have passed over me. I wake up already feeling tired.

I do take medicines to sleep otherwise I don’t sleep at all. My mind wouldn’t let me. Some people say to me: “how a young 26 year old girl, like you, would have trouble to sleep? Its like you carrying the whole world over you and you even have no reasons to be like that”. To these people I should only reply showing the middle finger and saying a very bad word, if you know what I mean. But my parents gave me some manners, so my polite answer to that is silence.

I started to read a book last night, called The Secret. My auntie, who is very bright and extremely wise told me about this book, that she read it and she liked it. So I thought to give it a try. I’m enjoying the book so far, talks about the power of your thoughts, the Attraction Law, where similar things are attracted by each other. So if you have good thoughts, your going to attract good thoughts as well. And that your thoughts are the results of your present life. So, if you only have bad thoughts, the attraction law will bring more bad thoughts and the result of that is a miserable life. Well, I can say that all of this have a good foundation. It makes sense to me. So I’m going to concentrate on thinking good things for my life to see if I make it better. As I officially made 2008 a Good Year for me, nothing better than start put this theory in practice.

I’ll certainly talk more about this book along this blog.

Now the P.S.: As I said in the presentation of this blog I would talk about a lot of other things, such as girlie stuffs: makeup, shopping, jewellery, etc. Sorry, people, I’m in debt in this department, but I promise I’ll talk tomorrow about something along that area. Please, don’t be mad at me for not getting into it yet, but I will =)))

I hope you all have a good Friday!

XxX